My Mom Came for A Visit

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My family lives all over the place.  A few of us are in San Diego now, and the other few {my parents and youngest sister} are on the East Coast. This summer marked the first time we were all back together IN San Diego since they moved six years ago. My parents and little sister were planning on coming out for a week or so, but after the diagnosis, my Mom and Dad decided to stay for a full month.  My Dad had work to do {they own a home here that he needed to fix up}, and my Mom wanted to be able to spend time with me and help me with anything I may need.

It was lovely.

My Mom and Dad left just last week, and I realized, after they were officially gone, what a comfort it was to have my Mom around for several weeks with no agenda other than being my support and assistance. She cleaned my floors and bathroom every week, did my laundry, took me out to lunch, and bought me a few maternity shirts at Gap. If I said I needed to take a nap, she had no problem sitting in the living room and doing nothing. If I said I needed a day off, she found something else to do or spent time with another friend or daughter. Overall, it was a real blessing, and I am sad she is gone now. I am, clearly, not sure how to navigate this season of grief, but having someone who is grieving with you but also knows you and supports you as only a parent can, was really helpful.

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While my parents and sisters were here, we did some really fun things. It has been interesting to observe the intimacy that comes to a family when going through crisis together. We seemed to have even more fun than usual, and, from my perspective, we also seemed to be more unified as a “clan” than we have been in the past. Since Katherine, our youngest sister, was only here for a week, we tried to squeeze in as much fun as we could for her stay. We rented bikes on Coronado and spent the day riding around the island. Super fun, and something we have done for years. Word to the wise: if you haven’t been on a bike in a year or two, your bum will be sore after a couple hours of riding around. The fun outweighs the soreness, but the soreness is still a serious factor to consider.

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We also managed to get to the beach a couple of times. Once just as sisters, and then again after Katherine had already left, where both of my parents came along. We felt like this was a major accomplishment, because my Dad, despite having grown up as a surfer/swimmer, does not particularly love being at the beach or getting sandy. I am usually scared of getting in the water {hello SHARK WEEK!!!!}, but for some reason since the diagnosis, I have decided that our baby likes to swim. It could be the fact that I am 5 1/2 months pregnant and ROASTING all the time so any chance to cool off sounds amazing… but I’m going to stick with “our baby likes to swim.”

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While my parents were here, Glenn and I also had the opportunity to go with them to Jet Propulsion Laboratories in Pasadena. My Mom is *slightly* obsessed with space, so she arranged for us to do a half-day tour, and had to sign up months in advance. We enjoyed the day together, driving up through LA, spending the day at JPL, and then introducing my parents to authentic Ramen and boba tea for dinner.

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Finally, just a few days before leaving, my Mom arranged a high tea for my mother-in-law, herself, and me. Who doesn’t love a good cucumber sandwich?! We enjoyed each other’s company {at least I think we did…. I guess I never asked either of them! ha!} and the delicious food and teas we were served.

Although I am sad my Mom and Dad and Katherine left, I am also looking forward to getting back to a more normal routine. Ultimately, I would love nothing more than ALL of my family to move back to San Diego so we could spend more time together and just live normal life in closer proximity, but I am grateful that they all make an effort to spend time with me as often as they can.

Glenn and I are blessed with families and friends who support and encourage us every day. I know this is not the case for everyone faced with a fatal diagnosis, and I am overwhelmed at the ways God is protecting us from so many other hardships right now. Thank you for reading along, for being kind, and for caring about us. Coming up next on the blog:: Gender Reveal!

~Kristin

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